You may recall, I met the lovely Martina Hughes, Founder of Tantric Blossoming at the Mind Body Spirit Festival in Sydney some time ago. Martina recently wrote an inspiring post for the Gorgeous Things blog as a bit of an introduction to Tantra.

It might interest you to know - Martina’s post was the most read item of our Newsletter that month. So I know that many of you are interested in the subject and learning about the benefits of connecting with yourself and your partner on a much deeper level.

Your interest and my own curiosity has lead me to sign myself up for a Tantric Blossoming course and I’ll be sharing my experiences with you here on the blog.

To be honest, I’m quite apprehensive about the whole thing. I grew up in a household, like many of us where intimacy and sex weren’t really discussed and if they were it usually came with some kind of fearful warning. I’m not saying our parents got it wrong, they themselves grew up in a time of greater conservatism than you and I. Sometimes though, evolution needs a bit of a kick in the butt to get to the next level.

I’m looking forward to breaking down a few of my own barriers and I hope you’ll enjoy the journey and maybe even one day – take it yourself.

Right, I’m off! Feeling brave…

How does that song go…

“Those who mind don’t matter, and those who matter don’t mind.”

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By the way I’m building this up you’d think I’d done something totally heinous. Nothing quite so salacious I’m afraid.

I went to see a counsellor, a therapist, a psychologist – a shrink. There you have it – my confession. I had a complicated problem that I was struggling to solve on my own so I decided to seek outside help. The details of the problem aren’t the important part – we all have problems of varying degrees from time to time in our lives – mine are no more significant than yours. What is important is that at the end of the first session with my counsellor – I’d established a course of action that would lead toward the solving of my problem.

The second session took place on the following Friday. We talked about the steps I’d taken toward solving my problem. It was all going quite well – I’d ticked most of the boxes and had a clear plan of how I was going to tackle the remains steps. What a sense of accomplishment I felt.

No longer was I dwelling on the emotions I had been experiencing due to my problem – I was pragmatically focused on solving it. Sure, emotions have their place – they tell us when we’re wandering off the track and are there as a guide to serve us through life. But we’re by no means a slave to them – once emotions have alerted us to a problem then it’s up to us to take over and seek to solve the problem. It would have done the cavemen no good to be paralysed by fear, they would have become lunch.

No one was more surprised than me when at the end of the second session, my shrink told me I was fine and wouldn’t need to come back. I felt a pang of “but surely there’s something wrong with me” – why else would I have had a problem that I needed a therapist to help me solve? She must have interpreted my enquiring expression because she smiled at me and told me that everyone, from time to time has a problem they need an impartial person’s assistance to reframe the questions we seek the answers to. To which I smiled and thought to myself, there’s nothing wrong with me – I’m totally fine!

Anyway, enough about that – the reason I wanted to share this is that I got a bit of a shock when I slowly started to mention to my closest friends that I’d been to see a counsellor. All but 2 of them had at one time or another, out-sourced some help with their decision making process or employed the services of a therapist to help them clear of the clutter of their past.

Of the 2 who hadn’t, one confided that her and hubby were considering a bit of marriage counselling – things weren’t all that bad between them but they wanted to learn a few skills in the communication department to ensure things stayed good and they’d set a good example for their children to learn from.

So, when you think your problem might just need an impartial sounding board – do what everyone else does – ask a professional!